11.7.12

Short Order

The LA Farmers Market is one of the best places in Southern California. If you visit LA and you like watching people (real people mixed with tourists and weirdos) this is a good place to come. The smells are fantastic, it's close and old-fashioned, it brims with character and charm.

Short Order at the Farmers Market is a collaboration between the late Amy Pressman, famed LA chef, and Nancy Silverton, pastry chef and co-founder of the La Brea Bakery. It's one of those places that promises a lot by emphasizing the basics - good, fresh ingredients, simply combined. It's right next door to the farmers market, so produce is literally on their doorstep. They have no excuses. Their burger is over $13.

I'm sorry to report that, to date, Short Order is the worst burger that we've eaten. We rated Burger King higher than this one. And we ate Burger King against our will in one of the dingiest parking lots in the whole world, wishing we were dead the whole time.
We actually ordered two burgers - the Short Order Burger (clearly their signature) and the Old School Burger. Both were dripping with mayo, which is just unforgivable for us, neither of us like too much mayo, and in the case of the Old School Burger the over-mayo actually made it kind of inedible and slimey. Oozing and dripping all over the place. There isn't a burger we've tried that's successfully used mayonnaise.

But forget the Old School Burger - we're rating the Short Order Burger. And it was terrible. I took one bite and felt like I wanted to barf.
Two things I hate - mushrooms and horseradish. Both of them were on this burger and the shrooms are abundant. Maybe some people like mushrooms on a burger. We do not and I cannot understand how anyone could like them. I don't like them even on their own, but on a burger? It's not traditional and it's not right.
A few positives to take away, as they say in sports: the bun was great. Silverton's clearly pulling her weight. The meat was fine. It probably would have been fine with just the meat and the bread, but all the toppings sunk it.

Here's our theory of the failings of gourmet burgers like this one and Comme Ca: Problem with people who are proper chefs, is that they try to incorporate their chefy knowledge into the burger world. They believe that the complimentary foods of cuisine should define how they create their burgers. So, mushrooms go together with steak. But it doesn't work on a burger. The public have different ideas of what burgers are and you shouldn't bring your idea of cuisine into it. It doesn't work.
So, in summary - come to the farmers market. Get a beer and watch the people mill about. Don't go to Short Order. It's a waste of time and money.

The Scores:

Meatiness - 2
Succulentiousness - 1
Bun - 5
Flavor - 1
Stay Togetherness - 3
Joint - 3


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